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@calippy dreamt this then made it real

chaumas-deactivated20230115:

thanks to this workplace harassment training video my coworkers and I now say this to each other on a near-daily basis

penismage:

startedraining:

“Y— you’ve saved me! Why?”

“….. Monkey.”

“Why—?”

“Monkey! You have shown me monkey….. Mmm…. Monkey.”

iamnotlanuk:

iamnotlanuk:

she deconstruct my joke format til it is indistinguishable from that which it is derived

she suck on my dick til I cum

ghostcrows:

warning to all beverage drinkers

condensention will make your fucking cup stick to the, coaster and the coaster will get glued to the cup from water particles. VERY DANGEROUS. please wear a hard hat and go online to webkinz.com and spin the wheel of wow to get a fun prize, every day daily

saltmalkin:

black cat & lilies

annieversary3:

im so :3 coded im so ^-^ pilled im so autistic

akascribblefox:

Hades Boons, but as potions

thischick25:

orcboxer:

himbofisher:

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today the miami dolphins punter accidentally kicked a ball directly into his teammate’s ass

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girlblocker:

vampiregirlsblog:

girlblocker:

girlblocker:

me if meowing was a sin tbh

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& heres me if meowing was illegal

But it’s not so enjoy

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so true, here i am happy and free because nobody can morally or legally stop me from meowing